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  • Carmen Graham

An Open Letter to Meghan Markle Haters



Let me paint a scene for you. 


You live in a new country and took a new job. 


You're a new mom. Like under 6 months on the job new

Your husband travels a lot for work, and often, you're expected to be there too. 


Your in-laws are sort of intense. The family business is all-encompassing. 


Your sister-in-law is AWESOME. But *everyone* agrees. To the point where the comparison game is constant. 


Your mother-in-law, rest her soul, was a force and you wish you could ask her opinion. But you can't. And what's more, you're also constantly reminded how awesome she was, too. 


Also, your own family is kind of a mess, but you really can't talk about it. 



Sound familiar? Strip away names and titles and money and all of the things we *THINK* we know to be true about Meghan Markle's life sound....pretty intense. 


If I think back to my first few months as a wife, then as a mom, then when I went back to work, the first time I had to have hard conversations with mine and my husband's families, there is no rule book for any of it. Some days are amazing and idyllic and storybook. Others, you're literally just counting the hours until babies fall asleep and you're in bed with no one asking anything from you. 


Now I think of what would happen if I had to do all of it in the public eye. With the scrutiny of

media that has never given you a fair shake. I know what you're thinking: She's rich. She's royalty, literally. She's got everything on a silver platter. 


To that I say, when has money solved anything? Sure she's probably sleeping with the help of a night nurse. Fine, she's probably got the best trainer to help her get back in shape. I'll give you that she signed up for marrying into one of the most visible (and scrutinized) families in the world. 


But who are we to judge how she feels? Who are we to say that there's not a person underneath it all who, whether she signed up or not, had to be real with herself, her husband, and her new baby to say enough is enough. 


Dear hater, haven't you been there? Where grinning and bearing it isn't possible anymore? Where you need help. Or a break. Or at the very least, the opportunity to make it better.


What's more, NO ONE knows what happens in the depths of your house or your soul. Same goes for our girl Meghan. You don't know what's happening behind those ancient halls of the castle she calls home. You have no idea what it's like to watch–cough, racist, cough–media tear you apart. ˆ


We don't know anything. So who are we to judge?


Let's do this. Let's all agree more compassion in 2020. More grace for ourselves and for people we literally do not know. 


And as for me, I'm with you Meghan.


I, too, am done with things that don't bring me peace in 2020.


And if down the line things change, then it's okay to change with them. 


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